Things are mostly okay again. I actually managed to secure a job! I actually got the offer earlier last month but the contract wasn't signed until a little after and I only just started the visa process. I won't be unemployed, so that's a relief. The only thing is, I'm pretty damn sure that I'm not gonna be in the country on the 24th, like we booked flights for. It's gonna be a bit after unless I'm lucky. I should survive, but it's really annoyed me. I also am not feeling great about certain personal shit that I won't get into, but honestly? I just need to talk to people and get into a better place. I'm just not good at that though...
In other news...I started reading Homer. The Iliad has been incredible so far - I'm nearly halfway through already and I only started a week ago - and has made me re-evaluate all of my approaches to learning. It is so enjoyable to just actually get right into learning and recreation and do something meaningful, and I feel invigorated to actually learn enough to talk confidently about things I care about instead of being paralysed by the need to get it right. This felt especially true when I went to Yorkshire on Saturday.
Oh and I took a leap and changed TJS into Juniper's Corner, because why not. Still yet to practice as a group - I fear we never will at this rate, whether or not I move back home after Korea is a huge part of the problem and we have yet to find time together before I fly out...
Been a busy couple weeks. Mainly in terms of getting ready for moving, the two of us not being at each other's throats over minor bullshit, and trying to not run out of money before then...it all stacks up. I've been maintaining my sanity by learning tube stations in zone one of London.
I do honestly think I'll be much more at ease when I'm over there, but my partner flies out on Tuesday and that's probably at least 3 weeks before I join her, so I need to keep sane until then. She went back home today, so I should consider getting back into the Iliad and finishing it before I fly. I'd like to read Odyssey when I'm abroad, but I also now have an old Kindle to store books on, so that's neat.
Reaching levels of stressed and uncertain I haven't felt in ages. Not to mention many instances of feeling ignored and unappreciated by a fair few people, but I'll see if that's just me being paranoid again. Not feeling my best. Maybe I shouldn't have stopped my meds, but then I probably would have lost the job without doing so and definitely would've lost it if they caught me lying about not being on them...I'm so tired.
It's all much better now. I got my issuance number, finally, on the 26th, sent off the actual application that day, got it approved on the 28th! I got my passport back yesterday so now I'm properly flying on the 4th. I have training I'm doing, I finished the Iliad (it was fucking incredible and I love Hector like he was my own child), and I feel confident about living together with my girlfriend. I don't want to jinx anything though, so I'll be conscious of things on my mind such as how I need to be healthier and less anxious.
The main thing now, though, is to make sure I'm packed soon and trained for the job. I'll be teaching little primary school-aged kids English. The training does kind of give me a few red flags, such as the casual AI usage and somewhat untested teaching approach, but I do, have at least some faith in their approach. It seems plausible and effective.
In the meantime, I got back onto Tomodachi Life, and I also am going to start practicing writing more regularly. If by the new year I can write really short stories (even just 100 words) and make them good, then I'll be happy.